The MisAdventures of Max and Jude
by YourFavoriteMemory
Summary: What on Earth can these two best mates get themselves into? This is just a series of drabbles that leak out of my mind and drip into a puddle on the floor. Implied Max/Jude at some points.
1. Locked In!

Jude was puzzled.

No, at this point he was beyond puzzled.

He was bloody confused.

_Where on Earth could the cleaning supplies be other than the closet?_ Jude had been rummaging around the closet for the past half hour to no avail. Yes, indeed, he had gotten himself into quite a pickle. There was a rather obnoxious spill in the kitchen that he needed to take care of before Sadie got home and got mad, she still had yet to get over the small dent…hole…in the wall Max had caused the previous week. There was now a peephole between their rooms. As much as he loved his best mate like the best mate he was, it was a wee bit creepy to know that he could be watching Jude when he was drawing or sleeping. All this was making him frustrated. Not like an angry, I'm-gonna-blow-shit-up angry, but an annoyed angry. Jude got annoyed a lot, but never mad. He just wasn't like that, his personality didn't really allow for much unbridled anger and rage. Plus, having Max as a best friend teaches self control like no other. In annoyance, Jude kicked at the bottom of the shelves before he realized how unstructurally designed they were. The leg buckled and the shelves came crashing down. Everything that had been sitting on the shelves were now crashing on top of the Brit as he held his hands over his head as a meek state of protecting himself. When the dust cleared, Jude coughed roughly a few times before looking around to the trouble he had caused. The entire shelf was destroyed and the variety of…cleaning supplies…were sitting on the floor, after they had slid off of the top shelf.

_Well, why get a bloody ladder when you can just take the whole damn thing down?_

He also noticed that in the process of falling down, the variety of falling cleaning supplies, or maybe it was the shelves, took the doorknob off, locking Jude in the dusty, cluttered, not-so-tidy closet.

_Shit. Bloody shit._

Jude kicked some of the cans away and made himself comfortable on the floor. No one was supposed to be home for a while. Sadie and Jojo were at Club Huh? getting ready for a show that night, only God knows where Prudence went, Lucy was working, and Max was probably off getting drunk somewhere. He pounded on the wall in a vain attempt that maybe that would crash down too. But alas, no such thing was to happen to him. Now that would just be too cool…

The sound of a door slamming startled Jude from his light doze. "Anyone home?" Jude had never been so bloody happy to hear the American's voice ringing through the apartment.

"Maxie! In here!" Jude pounded on the door, hoping to get Max's attention. But Max could only hear a light tapping.

"So someone IS here! Or maybe it's just my imagination…oh well!" The shaggy blonde haired man went looking around the rooms for any sign of life, or something to entertain him. He stopped in front of the closet door, the source of the tapping noise. "Is anyone in there?"

"Max, you tosser!"

"Jude…what are you doing in there…are you saddddd?" Max asked. Jude rolled his eyes and smacked his head against the back wall. Why couldn't someone else have come home to help him out of his predicament? "Hey Judeee."

_So he starts singing… _

"MAX! SHUT UP!" Jude yelled, pounding on the door. Max stumbled backwards, holding his head.

"What?"

"I need you to get me out of here." Jude paused momentarily to cough roughly again, the dust was collecting again. "And I swear, I won't say anything sarcastic or mean for the rest of the day." There was silence on the other side of the door. _Dear God…what if I lost his attention…_

"Can I get that in writing?"

"GO MAX!" Jude could hear scurrying on the other side and he smiled. Finally, he'd get out of here. Air would never taste quite as good. Yes, taste. But after a few minutes, he didn't hear any sign of Max returning. "Max? Maxie?" Jude inquired, shifting his weight to lean against the door and press his ear against it. He could hear some dresser doors being opened…_oh hell no_… "MAX OUT OF MY CLOTHES!"

"But they are so delightfully baggy!" Max exclaimed and Jude facepalmed himself. This was going to be a long next few hours…

"Maxie, can you please just get me out of here?" Jude heard Max's footsteps approach the door and stopped in front of it.

"Wait, are you really stuck in there?"

_What kind of question was that?_

"No, I'm in here because I needed some alone time." Jude replied sarcastically. Unfortunately, Max did not pick up the sarcasm as quickly as he hoped.

"Oh. I'll leave you alone then."

"MAX! THAT WAS SARCASM!"

"Hey! You said no sarcasm today!" Jude could hear the poutiness in Max's voice outside the door and he sighed. He couldn't take a pouty Max, especially not a sad Max. And that was where he was headed if he didn't get out of here. Because Max would fear the wrath of an angry Jude.

"That is null and void until I am out of here. Yes, I am stuck in here."

BANG BANG BANG!

"Where did you get the bloody stick?" Jude asked, lying on the ground and writhing. It appeared Max had found a stick like object and smacked the door with it. The sound bounced around in Jude's head for a while before it finally subsided. "All right, you've had you jollies. Now can you let me out?"

"The door's locked."

"Of course it is." Jude replied, sitting against the door. "Max, are you sure there's no way you can get me out?"

"Try turning the doorknob on your side."

"Well, seeing as I am HOLDING the doorknob, that will do nothing."

"Oh…well, I got nothing for ya." Max said in a happy tone before walking off to the kitchen. If Jude ever got out of here…

Then, the sound came.

A blessed sound that made the angels sing.

The front door opening. Someone else was home!!!

"What's going on in here?" Sadie asked, stepping inside.

"SADIE!" Jude yelled, pounding on the door. "Can you get me out of here?"

"Jude? Why are you in there?"

"…Can we not go into that?" Jude asked, pushing on the door. "Max was no help, I've been in here for hours, and I swallowed so much bloody dust I'll be coughing up dust mites for weeks. Can you just get me out?" He heard the doorknob twist and it opened. Jude had been pushing on the door, so he fell, sprawling out on the cold wooden floor.

"Wow, you look like shit." Sadie commented as Jude stood up, brushing himself off. "And what the hell did you do to my closet?"

"How'd you get me out so fast?" Jude asked, purposely avoiding the question.

"All Max had to do was turn the damn knob, it was unlocked." Max stood at the doorway, half a banana crammed into his mouth.

"I just wanted to see how long you could go in there!" Jude slowly turned to his friend and a twisted grin broke out of his face.

"Max…come here…"

"No Jude!" Max took off running down the stairs.

"I'm not gonna hurt you…I just wanna show you something, best mate!" Jude called, running after him.


	2. Paint Fight

This had to come out perfectly, nothing could go wrong here.

Jude was crouched over his sketchbook at the table where he always worked, his fingers making their moves, as if they had their own mind. He had no control as to what happened to the paper, he only was the mind subconsciously holding onto the charcoal, making something out of nothing, a figment of his subconscious mind…why didn't he just damn well go into writing? It'd work a whole lot better than this! Jude slammed his head on the desk and ran a hand through his mud colored brown hair. The door slammed in the distance and he heard footsteps equivalent to an elephant or a very large horse. That could only mean one thing.

"JUDE!!!"

It had been three days since the closet incident, and Jude still carried a wee bit of a grudge with the blonde haired shaggy American. Jude bit his lip and continued drawing aimlessly on the paper. He could feel some hot breath down his neck, which made the hair on the back of his neck raise up.

"Judey, are you still mad at me about the closet?"

"Well, considering I've been coughing up dust for the past three days, I think I have the right to be a bit angry." Jude replied a bit too harshly than what he wanted to. "'m sorry Max."

"Don't sweat it." Max replied, looking thoughtfully towards Jude's room. Jude didn't notice and looked up to his friend. "I'm bored!"

"You're not five, entertain yourself, you tosser."

"But Judey you're entertaining!" Jude sighed and ran a hand through his hair again. Frustration was mounting, and in about thirty seconds Jude was going to lose his cool.

"I don't want to be rude or anything, mate, but I'm sort of working 'ere."

"You've got a lot of work going on there; I feel it's a keeper!" Max replied sarcastically, walking away. Normally, this kind of attitude would make Jude suspicious, but now his guard was down, but his visual senses were heightened as he looked at the drawing he had made. It wasn't even a drawing, it looked like…crap. He crumpled it up and threw it over his shoulder, not really caring at all where it landed. As he groaned in a frustrated manner, slamming his hands on the table. He needed a distraction…

_Distraction…_

"Oh Maxie!" Jude called, standing up and walking to his room. There he saw Max…with his paints…and a blank canvas. The blonde was standing above the canvas, with a paintbrush that had been dipped in blue. "Max…let's not do anything _hasty_…"

"Oh, trust me, this ain't hasty. What I'm going to do in my room later tonight with a pretty lady, well, that will most likely be hasty. But this…" Max flicked the paintbrush, sending droplets of blue on the canvas, soiling the white cleanliness of the canvas.

"**WHAT THE HELL!"** Jude watched as his beloved canvas being soiled.

"Oh come on Judey, liven up! We've got a hell of a lot of livin' to do, and not a lot of time to live it!" He flicked the paintbrush back and ended up nailing Jude with the paint. Jude jumped back in shock and wiped the paint away from his eyes. "Ooh…" Jude picked up the paintbrush and dipped it into the green paint. "Judey…"

"My sympathy was left behind a long time ago, Maxine…" Jude responded, flicking the paint brush at him, spraying Max's face, shirt, and hair with the green paint.

"Ah, my eyes!" Max covered and rubbed his eyes, only rubbing the paint around his eyelids and making himself look like a green monster. Or at least have green monster eyelids. Without speaking, the two boys grabbed all the paint they could get their hands on. Red, yellow, pink, and purple paint colored the boys and everything else in the room. Paint sprayed everywhere, and Jude didn't even try to take cover as he sprayed Max with paint, laughing and stopping momentarily to brush some stray droplets of paint out of his face and his eyes. Normally, he'd be bloody furious at Max for ruining his canvas, his hair, and his room. But this was taking the stress off, the stress Jude had needed so badly to relieve himself of was now taking the form of human art.

Eventually, paint had run out, and the boys were lying on the floor, lying back to back, panting heavily. Jude's mind was still reeling from the moments before. "Hey Max?"

"Yeah Jude?"

"Thanks so much for taking my mind off of this…and ruining my canvas, you cheeky monkey."

"I wouldn't say that, Judith." Jude turned to the canvas and saw an explosion of color, vibrant with emotion and expression.

_Maybe this didn't turn out so bad after all. _


End file.
